I’m calling 2020 the year of Aligned Action. It’s about showing up for yourself and feeling so deeply connected to who you are and what you’re here to do, that when you take action, it all flows from an aligned place.
Are your business goals aligned with your highest good?
To take aligned action, it’s so important to make sure your goals are right for you. For intuitive entrepreneurs, this means that setting goals goes beyond writing it down.
When I set really ambitious goals for my business, like wanting to bring in 300 new students, before just jumping with the idea, I take some time to tune in and see how it feels, often bringing my Tarot cards into the process.
For me, this is the sweet spot of bringing in my Highest Self for guidance.
When I’m setting goals for my business, I’m always tuning in to my Highest Self, using my Tarot cards to really calibrate my goals.
So often I see entrepreneurs without clear goals or goals that don’t feel quite right. This can cause you to miss your mark. You might even get frustrated, or down on yourself thinking you’ve failed, when really the goal just wasn’t right for you.
If you can relate, don’t despair.
Today on the Intuitive Entrepreneur Podcast, I’m going to help you set goals that are in alignment with your highest good.
Joining me this week on the podcast is guest, Bethany Londyn, an energy healer, life coach and alignment catalyst. She is here to help us to get into that place of aligned goals and aligned action with body intelligence.
In this episode, you’ll hear Bethany and I chat about: :
- What aligned goals are and why they are important
- Using your body’s wisdom and trusting the messages you receive
- Creating space for your intuition during your day
- How to handle unsupportive family and friends
- Getting to the root of your desires
- Staying open to more with your YES
- Bringing spiritual support into your business
If you’re ready to start thinking about your goals, your vision, and your dreams for your business in a different way, then check out IEP035: Get Aligned Now with Bethany Londyn to tune into your innate wisdom and make shift happen.
Brigit: Welcome to The Intuitive Entrepreneur podcast. I'm your host, Brigit Esselmont, intuitive business strategist and mentor. As the founder of Biddy Tarot, I turned my love for Tarot into an abundant seven figure business. The secret to my success, making intuition and strategy my entrepreneurial superpower. And now I'm inviting you to do the same. In this weekly podcast, I'll be sharing advice, tools and real-life examples from some of the best intuitive entrepreneurs, to show you how you can trust your intuition, align with your purpose, and create a positive impact through your work. Let's make it happen.
Hello and welcome back to The Intuitive Entrepreneur podcast. Today I am talking with Bethany Londyn, who is an energy healer, life coach and alignment catalyst. She helps men and women jumpstart their life towards manifesting their dreams, overcoming limiting beliefs and obstacles along the way. And Bethany's mission is to support people in finding their own truth, which in turn produces their innate freedom. Her personalized approach allows her clients to dig deep and align with actual results like never before. And just recently, Bethany launched her new book, Get aligned now; the path to achieve aligned results. And I came across Bethany's book while just puttering around on Amazon.
And as soon as I saw it, I knew that I needed to have Bethany on this podcast for this particular season because we are here now at the start of 2020 as this episode is being published, and this is prime time to start thinking about your goals and your visions, and your dreams for your business. And I wanted to bring on Bethany to help us to get into that place of aligned goals and aligned action. Because so often we get coached around how to set goals and perhaps it's the smart goals or what have you, but we often forget about tuning into those goals and making sure that those goals are in true alignment with who we really are, and what we really want to do in this lifetime. So I'm super excited to have Bethany on for this conversation. And we do talk a lot about finding that place of alignment with your goals. And then as you manifest those goals, how can you really bring it into being, in a way that honors who you truly are on a deep and divine level. So let's get started.
Hello Bethany. It is so good to have you. How are you doing today?
Bethany Londyn: I am great, thank you. So happy to be here.
Brigit: That is good. Awesome. And congratulations on your book launch. I know how much work and effort goes into that, so-
Bethany Londyn: Yeah, apparently you do.
Brigit: Yes. Yeah. And like a book launch is always such a beautiful celebration of all of the work that you have done over the years, that have led to where you are now. I would love to hear a little bit about your journey, what's brought you to where you are now, particularly through your business and your work.
Bethany Londyn: Well, okay. So we're not focusing... Are we talking about the book? What brought me to the book? Notice I brought it.
Brigit: Yeah.
Bethany Londyn: It started three years ago. So four years ago, I am pretty sure, is when I was doing Periscopes. So it's funny because I had my own coach, I believe in coaches, and he was always like, "Bethany, I see you doing video. I see you doing video." And I'm like, "I don't know what you're talking about." So he had me do this stretch, basically, and every single night or day, I was to send him a minute-long video. And I was so uncomfortable, to the point that I would do at the last thing I would do at night. Like before hopping into bed, I did not want to do a video. And after two months of doing video, all of a sudden it clicked and I was like, "This is good. I like this." And I started reading, I don't know if you've heard of Calling in the One, by Katherine Woodward Thomas.
Brigit: Yeah.
Bethany Londyn: So it's very much a workbook. And I started reading that on Periscope and totally developed a following. Plus being totally vulnerable, and then all of a sudden everyone's like, "Where's your book? Where's your book?" Asking me. And I'm like, "Yeah, I have, obviously, some value here to give. And what am I going to write about?" And it probably took a bit, but one day I was sitting by the water in Marina Del Ray. I live in Los Angeles, California. And it just like hit me. I was going to write about intuition, because this was the thing that I struggled with the most. So, so I wrote this, or apparently 75%, which I didn't know, took a two year break run, I got involved in a real estate startup, which I talk about in the book, and I just love startup industry. I love the energy, and I just jumped full in and I didn't really question it. I was very excited, not really trusting my body. And when I came out and finished a month before I quit, a challenged me. He's like, "Bethany, what about your book?" This is four years later.
And like, "Yeah. What about that book?" I don't even remember what it was about, kind of thing. And I had had publishers offering me deals and everything, and I jumped into the startup. So I go back to my book and I realized, "Oh my gosh, it was done. It was pretty much done. I only had two chapters left to write." And the book, although yes, the focus was intuition, really. I think the underlying current of everything I'm hearing these days has to do with a concept called body intelligence. So that's where the book Get Aligned Now is where I ended up, instead of talking into intuition, even though the whole entire book is also about that, it's about trusting your body and letting your body guide you. And when I look back, there are many times my body guided me and I did not listen. So we got to get the message out. Trust your gut. It's good. There's a reason for it.
Brigit: Yes. Well I'd love to hear a little bit more about body intelligence, and what does that really look like? How do you use your body intelligence to tune into your intuition?
Bethany Londyn: Yeah, so you've heard of emotional intelligence. It's been very much a trending topic over the last probably five years. And body intelligence is basically another version of that. So when you're emotionally intelligent, you're very aware of your emotions, you're aware of other people's emotions in the room, wherever you are. With body intelligence, you're feeling the emotion. So you're actually experiencing that within. And so you could walk into a room, and immediately feel like constructive experience. You might feel like a concave in your chest or a tightness. You could walk in and you see somebody and all of a sudden you feel an expansion and you feel light. And that is body intelligence. When you're, honestly, even just picking out clothes or something off the menu, I use my body. I do. So I'll run my hand down and I will listen to my body from when it says yes. And it does tell me yes. And that's when I'm like, "Okay, that's what I'm wearing. That's what I'm getting to eat." It really can be used for every single decision you make, every moment of the day. You just have to learn to listen.
Brigit: Yes, yes. And tell me about a time when you have listened, and it's really paid off, because you know what I'm going to ask after that. But for now let's focus on what happens when you do really listen to it? Like have you had some beautiful opportunities open up for you?
Bethany Londyn: Yeah. So I would say for example, my first paying speaking opportunity, I was really nervous. I was really stressed. It was for a healthcare company. And I'm like, "What am I going to say? What am I going to say to liven up the room, and really motivate these people? And the goal of this talk was to bring everyone together and to bring them basically in alignment of the vision." And I was really stressed. And when you think about it, a lot of people, when we're stressed, it's all in the head. So it has nothing to do with what's going on in the body. And a lot of times, nervousness is excitement turned inward, stress is excitement turned inward. So when I was preparing for the speech, I was so nervous, but I was also tingling from head to toe. And when I got up and started doing the delivery and everything, the words just flowed right out of me. I was on fire. It felt amazing. And I'm like, "I'm supposed to be doing this." You just know.
And I think that is the underlying current of what a lot of people are talking about. I was listening to a podcast from Marie Forleo, I'm sure you know her, and she was talking about her new book, and how she was tingling when she was doing something. And I'm like, "Yes, the tingle." It's all about the tingle. When you're tingling, you know you're aligned and in complete harmony with where you're supposed to be, your truth and everything. So yeah.
Brigit: And I think that's really good to have that as an anchor point, like a physical anchor that if you do have that tingling sensation that is, this is the space where everything is coming into flow. And then I would love to look at the flip side of that. When have you not listened to that body intelligence, and what has happened as a result?
Bethany Londyn: Well, there are times when I haven't listened to it. And then there's also times where I didn't think to check with my gut first, because I didn't even know that was something that was available to us. They say that the Egyptians used to think that our brains were in our stomachs, which is your gut, and that's because you're being delivered all these sensations, when you get really present to it. A lot of people will feel it in their stomach. They might feel it in their chest as well. So for me, the first moment that I can remember, it would be my ex husband.
So he worked down the hall from me, and my boss had told me that he liked me. So I already knew that. So one day he walks by and he touches me as he walks by, and I was like, "Ugh." Like immediately, just like wanted to curl..." Not hurl, like curl over, which is a very constructive space. It's making me smaller. It's just an automatic response. And I ended up marrying that guy. What? So they say that we learn in point where we know. Our body knows in 0.9 seconds, exactly what it needs to know. And so if we're tuned in, then we're being guided like, "Yes." "No." Work with this person. Don't work with this person. Date this person. Don't date this person. And got to follow the yes.
Brigit: Yeah. And I think so often, we can get caught up with what other people are thinking like, "Oh, this is going to be great. You're going to love it." Like, "He's such a great guy," maybe.
Bethany Londyn: Yes. Which is exactly what was happening.
Brigit: And maybe you're left thinking like, "Oh, maybe this feeling I shouldn't be paying attention to it. Maybe I'm seeing things all wrong. Maybe I'm shut down to something." Does that resonate for you in that situation?
Bethany Londyn: Well, pertaining to that story in particular, I had tons of people saying, just date him Bethany. You're going to have fun. You guys are going to have so much fun. He makes lots of money. Whatever." So they were like, "You'll probably go on a helicopter ride or something." I don't know. We never did go on a helicopter ride. And just to make that clear, we did have fun though. We traveled a lot and had a blast. And obviously knowing that it ended in divorce, it wasn't a solid match. It wasn't a match that was aligned for me. And I later learned that when people were crying at our wedding, "Oh my gosh, I thought it was just because they're so connected to us and it's such a beautiful moment." No. They were crying because they knew it wasn't right.
I heard this after I got divorce. Can you believe it? So you really got to trust your own truth, and not allow other people's projections or stories. They're sharing information with you based on their own past stories. Like you don't need to operate off of their stories, operate off of yours and create new ones. And yeah, "There's a snow. I need to go like this."
Brigit: Yes. How are you bringing this into your business? How do you integrate this intuitive intelligence in your business?
Bethany Londyn: Oh, well, when I'm coaching clients, I always meditate on them beforehand. So I usually meditate before I ever do an actual coaching. And my coaching is not the norm. It's more on the very spiritual side, which is at the very end of my book. My book transitions into very spiritual. So yes. So when I am working with clients, I will use, not only the guidance that I was gifted, I also listen to my body, because when they're talking, I'll be asking questions, and I'm getting a yes, and a no response of where to go, to make sure that is going to be in the highest and best serving for them. So I think what's most important for people is to figure out what is their yes and what is their no.
Brigit: Is it different for each person? Yeah.
Bethany Londyn: Yes. So for me, I, and let me be honest, it took me two years to figure out my yes and my no. And that is purely because I did not trust. I didn't trust the response that I was getting. And they say, not that I think anything happened to me, but they say that a lot of people that have trust problems, it has to do with before the age of seven, before the age of five, especially because it's the first lesson you learn as a baby. So if you're not fully taken care of, you are immediately learning whether or not you can trust people.
So trusting my gut is a huge thing. And then discernment of whether it's right or wrong or even if I'm doing this and it feels wrong in my head, but my gut is telling me it's right, if it is right, I just don't know. But when you take the action, and you take the steps forward and you trust it anyway, all of the sudden, the answers are pouring out in front of you, and you realize why you were meant to go that route. So I don't know if that makes sense without me sharing specific stories, but-
Brigit: No, it's good. Does that mean that you, in order to be able to listen deeply to your intuition, do you have moments of silence of space? Like how does this look like? What does a day look like for you? Is that jam-packed with things, or has it got spaciousness in it?
Bethany Londyn: Depends on the day. Depends on the day. And I love coaching clients first thing in the morning. So sometimes I'll do 7:00 AM, 6:30 AM sessions. Preferably, as I mentioned, I want to do meditation for the client. I also like to do meditation for myself. So my mornings are always filled with at least one hour of what I call my magic hour. Some people call it power hour, miracle morning. So during that hour, I do basically stuff that has to do with my own personal growth. So whether it's reading something that's enriching. I know I wrote this book, but I'm still reading other stuff. I'm reading Mind to Matter right now. I don't know if you've heard that book.
Brigit: No.
Bethany Londyn: I'm enjoying it. It's a lot about the emotional freedom technique, EFT, the tapping. But what's beautiful about this book, aside from that process, which I also know, is they've really done their research. So it's a lot of scientific experiments in the book that support everything. Anyways, I'm going off track, but I love it. So my mornings are very enriching. I usually am doing a meditation of some sort. And I still, I would say, struggle with doing what I really want to do, which is 20 minutes of complete silence. I love guiding meditation. And I will do those first. And then I'll do my own questions and waiting for responses, that meditation, and prayer, and healing. I'll do theta healing on myself. And did I do quiet meditation this morning? No. I haven't yet. So I'm going to do it at some point today, but like yesterday, I made it to 15 minutes. So if I'm committing to it.
Brigit: Yes. It's great. Little by little.
Bethany Londyn: Little by little. It is still... It's a journey. It's a journey. Some days are easier than others. Some days my mind's racing, especially with this launch. So throughout the day, I usually do have meetings or I'm writing. So a lot of writing is very meditative, and it's like a download the whole time. So I guess it is probably spacious even though it doesn't feel like that.
Brigit: Yes. Yeah. I think it really speaks to the need to bring in some of that spiritual discipline into your day, because otherwise, when do you have that time to check in, and you keep going from one thing to the next if there's not that downtime?
Bethany Londyn: I'm holding a crystal right now. So I'm like using that as ground... Yes. My a friend gave it to me. And so yeah, I'm just always, whatever I can do to ground myself, because otherwise it's go, go, go, go, go.
Brigit: Yes. Which kind of segues into this concept of aligned to action and setting aligned goals. So what does it mean to be in alignment, especially when it comes to taking action on things?
Bethany Londyn: Well this is perfect because it is also part of my morning. So what I do in the morning is, I usually meditate on what is the highest and best for me to accomplish today? Because I can easily write down 100 things. So I will write like what is the number one highest and best thing to accomplish today? Let's like get really focused on that, and make that happen. And then what I do is, I will listen to my body and I will organize my get-to list. I still get-to. So it makes a little more fun and exciting. And whenever it takes. So that that supports me because when I'm writing the these things that I want to do, they all have to do with my vision for myself. So I want everything that I do to be lined up to be aligned to my vision. And sometimes I even just have to take a break and I probably do this once or every other week or so, and I'll write down different things. Because I have the coaching, I have the writing. There's multiple things going on. So art.
So it's like what is in alignment with me right now to be focusing on? Because it does shift from day to day. So that's how I keep myself on track and aligned, and the book is a whole different process. That's what I do in the morning. The book, isn't actually... It isn't a whole different process. It's a process that starts off with figuring out what is that vision of yours? And then you figure out where to go from there.
Brigit: Let's talk about that, because I think something that has come up for me a lot is, as long as you know what to ask for, like as long as you know what it is that you want, you can create it. But the hardest thing is actually to know what is it that you truly want. So I would love to hear more about your process around getting in tune with that vision and getting really clear about it, beyond just like, "I want to be a millionaire." Or, "I want a super yacht." Or, "I want, the mansion."
Bethany Londyn: Yeah.
Brigit: I know. It's on my vision board.
Bethany Londyn: Well, and it does change. And I love it. For sure. For sure. I've noticed... So I've always loved cars, and not from an egotistical thing. It's, I was the girl that had cars all over my bedroom when I was a kid. I didn't have like... Yeah, what do girls do? Models? No, that's guys too. I don't know. But I loved cars, and I've always... I would go to car shows. I would go to the antique car shows. I'd go to new car shows. So I've always been into cars. And there's this house in Portland, Oregon that I really want. My friend knows. And I've always had this vision of having it, and having a 12 car garage for all my cars, because I would rather spend money on cars than clothes, and figure out what outfit am I going to drive that day.
So now that I'm in LA, and around all the fancy cars here, I don't really care anymore. It's like, I like them. I maybe would like one antique, and I actually do talk about that in the book now that I think about, an old... I love the old Jaguars. I think they're beautiful. So things evolve. Things do evolve. And when I'm working with the companies, and like that first the healthcare company, I'm working with, creating a vision for the company, and a vision for the people and aligning the visions. Because when you back-track the vision, what's at the bottom? It's usually love, connection. Like that's what everyone wants. Although maybe not the company. But when you start getting down to like the root of what's underneath, why you want to have the super yacht or the mansion, what is underneath that? It's the family, it's the community that you're going to be welcoming into your home maybe to stay. So it's about focusing in on that, and the joyous experience, and then figuring out if you're even aligned to it. And that's what my book goes into.
So let's say, I always use this but I love it though, meeting Oprah. I would like to have a conversation with Oprah. Okay?
Brigit: Yes.
Bethany Londyn: Just, "Hello Oprah. We have some talking to do." And I was really fortunate and got to go to the Ellen show this year and guess who her guests was? Oprah. And she was 30 feet in front of me. It was amazing. I'm like, "My dream's coming true." So I didn't talk to her. But I had the experience that it's coming. And the thing is, if I'm like, "I want to talk to Oprah," where I'm going to be on her SuperSoul Sundays, her soul series, if I hold that vision way up here, and I'm here, then it's unattainable. So what I do is, I am looking to align you and bring that down to this level and bring you up to this level. So I'm all about whether it's raising your vibrations, your frequencies. Maybe it's a no. Maybe in this moment, it's a no for me to meet Oprah, and say that... Because in my highest... I get a no. I get a no.
So I would like it to be a yes. So all I need to do is work on the gap and figure that out, like, "Why is it a no? What steps do I need to shift to make it a yes." And by listening to my body, it could be the smallest thing. It could be that maybe in a few years I get to, it's like you just dive into these little fine questions like there was another thing about going on a vacation. I wanted to go on vacation with my parents, with my sister, with my husband, and her husband, and I kept getting a no. And like why? Why am I getting to know to going on vacation with them?
As soon as I took my sister and her husband out of the picture, I got a yes. So it's like, those small tweaks, and then you know where you're aligned in this moment. So that's where I go, because when you are aligned and things just are going to flow more effortlessly and easily and you're in harmony with it. And when it's something up here, and if I'm holding Oprah way up here, which just by speaking the way I am, I obviously am holding her at this pedestal. So it's going to make it more difficult for me to accomplish. So it's like, "We're equal here lady, and I have a lot to share. Then you're going to enjoy it, Oprah. Okay?"
Brigit: I think there's some really interesting things in that, in that sometimes what we think that we want is actually the thing that we really want. And so the vacation that you're talking about, paper, probably is like, "Of course I would want this. Why wouldn't I want it? This is going to be amazing." And yet tuning in showed you that it just needed a tweak. It was one little thing. And I think that's a really good thing to play around with our goals and our visions and go, "Alright, well..." I often do it like in terms of launches. It's like, "Alright, let's bring in 300 students." "Fantastic." Sit with it. "How does that actually feel?" "Oh actually, I think if we do 300, maybe it will be a little bit stretched." "Okay. Let's see. If I drove it back to 250, how does that feel? Okay. It feels all right."
And for me being a tarot reader as well, I'm pulling tarot cards on these and checking in for alignment and so on. So I think it's a really valuable process, going beyond just write down goal. And you know think that, "Oh I know exactly what the goal is," this big fancy thing. But just tune into it, because that's where the magic is.
Bethany Londyn: Right. Yeah. You got to feel it, and then you can feel if it's off, you need to tweak, move on.
Brigit: Yes.
Bethany Londyn: And if you must accomplish, you got to remove the gap. You got to figure out how to remove the gap.
Brigit: Yes. Yes. Because my next question was going to be, how do we bring this into manifestation? So this sounds like it's a step one, is to deal with that gap first. How can we do that?
Bethany Londyn: That's where I go into the meditation. It's all about asking questions, doing deep journaling. Like, "Okay, I wanted to sell 500 copies of my book on day one. It didn't happen. Why didn't it happen?" And it's about like, "Why didn't happen? Where did I stop myself before from succeeding in something that I wanted to accomplish? What age did that start?" So that's how I go. I'm all about backtracking, and then figuring out where that started, and pulling it and refilling it with something good. So it's very much meditative hypnosis prayer. It's theta healing is what I do. Theta healing. I don't know if you've heard of it. But yeah, I love Theta healing, and that's what I do.
So in the book, obviously because I can't be teaching everyone Theta healing in the book, I talk about asking those questions, asking the hard questions of, "Why isn't this happening? Where do I need to go? What could be in the way? Is there someone in..." Like you just keep going down a rabbit hole of asking questions, and listening to your intuition for a response, and just trusting that the first thing that comes to mind is only need to know. And go with it. And then ask the next question if you need to.
So a lot of times, I just ask one question and that's enough. But other times, you want to know more. Like, "No, this isn't good. This isn't enough. I need more. I need more detail." And sometimes it takes requesting support from somebody else, spiritually. So sometimes praying to God, praying to mother Mary, a mother Teresa even. I was working on a startup, and I talk about this in the book, I prayed to, Oh my gosh, am I seriously blanking on his name? The Apple guy.
Brigit: Oh, Steve Jobs.
Bethany Londyn: Steve jobs. And oh my gosh. When I requested support from him, I got such a laundry list of things. I was like, "Okay, nevermind. This does not feel right." That's what it's going to take? No, I'm not going to do it. So I take it a whole step further. When you aren't finding the answers within, I say request support from the highest in those truths. You have to make sure that you are fully connected to the highest light, God, heavens, divine, truth, and then ask the questions, because then you might get some additional insight. But if you just go to your friends and ask them the question, they're going to be giving you responses based on their stories.
Brigit: Yes.
Bethany Londyn: Like we were talking about in the beginning. So I really believe in going inward, and allowing... And hey, if the answers don't come right away, and like you're like, "I'm going to try this out tomorrow morning," and it doesn't work, just keep going. Keep going. Remember, it took me two years to learn to trust my gut, and I get a physical response. I get a yes, is like huge scrunch on my left side, and a right. It happens on the right side. Or yes is on the right side. So other people barely feel a thing, or they'll feel the lightness or heaviness or an expansion or construction. It's really about trusting everything that's given to you. It's your birthright.
Brigit: Yes, definitely. I want to go back to the idea of sharing this with your friends, and sometimes that they will have their own story and their own filters. I've heard of people who will not talk about their vision, or their goals, or their dreams, with friends, purely for the reason of not wanting outer influence on what is probably a very personal thing. And I'm just curious, how do you play that? Do you share your goals and dreams with others? Or is it at a certain point? Are you at a point... I'm imagining it's when you're feeling really strong and clear in what it is that you want to create. So tell me more.
Bethany Londyn: So family, let's talk about family. I'm the oldest of five, and loved them all. They all love me. Things are great. And I wouldn't share my own goals with them. No way. I will, just driving a nice car, I get flack from my family. So knowing that I'm already getting that is not good, and you don't want that resistance. In fact, let me go here, but the other day, one of the questions I asked, I don't remember what the question was. Anyway, something. And what came to me was that my I was allowing my family to hold me back. So not that they're consciously doing it, they aren't. But the thing is, I, I guess, which I don't feel like I'm this way. But apparently I want to be validated, and I wanted to be validated by my family. And they are not going to validate my vision because they are not... They're like, "Whatever Bethany. You're in LA. You're, in LA LA Land down there."
So I don't need that energy. So I'm not going to share with them. And because this is the family holiday season, I think it is important to go here. Some of the things that they used to say with my dad, out of complete love and support, he would be like, "Bethany, don't you think that's a little greedy?" I'm like, what? This was like once when I was writing offers on a house and I was talking about writing three offers in a day. "Don't you think that's a little greedy?" And I'm like, "Excuse me dad? I'm supporting people in buying houses and you're telling me I'm being greedy for supporting three people and writing offers." Like it doesn't make sense. So my question back to him, and I've given this advice to other people was to say, because I know my dad loves me, and I know in his mind he's trying to support me.
So I'm like, "Do you feel that was a supportive question? Do you feel that that question is serving me?" So I flipped, instead of answering the question, instead of getting only bent of like, "Are you kidding me?" Which was what my head was doing. I simply flipped it and I'm like, "Do you think that that comment was supportive?" And he was like... I don't remember what he said, but it made him think internally. And after a few times of these weird comments that weren't supportive to my growth and had nothing to do with what was actually going on for my truth, he eventually stopped asking those questions. And now he's like, "Bethany, you go get 'em." Like his whole attitude has shifted. And it works just by making him do the work instead. Because if I just flip out at him, and I'm like, "Dad, what are you saying? Are you kidding me? Like I have three people that want to write an offer, that's awesome. Go me. Like that's great. I'm supporting someone and I'm getting paid for it. Fancy that."
So going there, shifting that conversation has completely shifted the way my dad supports me in conversation, which is amazing. And when I did that healing the other morning, I realized that there was still a part of me that was waiting for a certain validation from my family to move forward. And I had to kick that in the bud because that's not my truth. But it was down there in the subconscious somewhere.
Brigit: Yes, yes. And clearly like his story is also playing through the questions that he's asking you, and I think, had you not been in a place of real conviction about your goals, you may have chosen to react. Whereas, you chose to respond, and responding is in a much more grounded place and comes from much better place for sure.
Bethany Londyn: Yeah, it was probably... It was more of a loving grounding than reactionary.
Brigit: So this episode is going to be going out at the, well, the start of 2020. And it's a time when, traditionally, most people are either setting their new year's resolutions, or as intuitive entrepreneurs, are setting goals for their business and starting to take action on those goals. What tips or advice would you have, in terms of being able to create aligned action when setting goals for your business?
Bethany Londyn: Yes. Well, first of all, do write your goals. I know so many people are like, "No, no, no." Yet the studies are there that show, if you write down your goals, you're 90% more likely to accomplish them. So I just want to say that. And from my perspective, and part of this is in the book, it really is not necessarily writing a goal for the year, but writing about a day. I want you to write about a day in your life that is perfect in your mind at this moment. And then from there, when you have your perfect day, then take out where the goals are. So if you're like, "I wake up in 2000 thread count sheets, and I look out my window and I see the sunrise." You're living in a home with a view, and maybe you're not right now. So then that obviously is one of the goals.
So you pull out the goals from your dream day. And a dream day in 2020 by the way. So you can do this, you can do this for five years down the road, 10 years down the road, you can do that as well. And let's just focus on 2020. And by the way, it is the start of a new decade. So pretty powerful.
Brigit: Oh, I'm excited about 2020. It's got some good feelings about it.
Bethany Londyn: So excited. Yes, yes. So pull out the goals from your best day ever, and then feel into every single line. So this is obviously, I think it's like a five step process. And you feel into, like, "Does this feel good? Does this feel heavy? Does this feel right?" And then you're figuring out what is your truth? And you might want to practice with something that feels awful and something that feels good, so you can figure out what is a yes or a no. Or just saying the word yes a bunch of times, and saying the word no a bunch of times, and feeling where that response is in your body. And then you work through these goals. And then what I do is I take the goals and I turn them into affirmations. Once you tweak them, they're all in alignment, because you want to do that as well. So that's technically step three. And then I turn them into affirmations, and be like, "Wait, what's at the root of having this beautiful home with this sunset sunrise view?"
And it's like, "I wake up glorious every morning. I am glorious." I shifting it to whatever is really at the root of that, which we actually discussed earlier. I am madly in love with myself. Like what are you experiencing in this best day ever, in this goal, and going there. And getting to that point every day is my goal for you. I want you to feel glorious every single day. What is going to make you experience that? If that's what it means to have a beautiful home with a sunrise view, it's amazing. What can you do today to get to that experience of feeling glorious?
Brigit: I love it. What a beautiful process. And I'm curious too, like we often, in our businesses, set numerical goals. So for example, "I'd like to sell 500 books on my first launch day, or launch week, or what have you." Or, "I would love to attract 300 students and so on." I'm curious what your thoughts are with that, because I know the other option is to go down the path of maybe, in the book example, I want to get my message out there to as many people as possible. So not having a number attached to it. I like the idea of numbers because it's very tangible and do you know, but then there's also the feelings that come with that of like, "Oh I didn't get there." Or, "I went way beyond it." Or whatever it might be. So what are your thoughts on that?
Bethany Londyn: It's really about figuring out what's aligned. Now, when I've been saying 500, I wanted 500 books sold on launch day, I don't think I ever checked in to see if I was aligned to that. I don't think I did. So it's hysterical because sometimes I'll ask a question to my friends, and they're like, "Bethany, what's your gut say?" And I'm like, "Oh, yeah." It's like I do it like 90% of the day, except for when I had this long question, and they ask you. Okay. So I don't know if I checked to see if that was in alignment with me. I don't know if you checked to see if three... Or you did. You were like, "Does this feel right?" And you moved to 250.
So yeah, I think that it is extremely important to really trust the body intelligence when talking about the numbers, and then tweaking it and knowing if you need to get to another number in your head, like what's it going to take to get there, and what's in the gap? And maybe what's more tangible is selling 100 books on day one. And that's okay, because what is the 100 of the 500 mark? It's kind of my ego. Let's be honest. And I'm all about the ego, because I'm all about owning your truth. Yet, what is really the benefit of 100 to 500? It could be because when I get to 500, then I'm going to be number one on Amazon, and instead of in the top 100, which is still pretty freaking good for the gazillions of books on Amazon. But you really want to tap into that.
And then also, does it feel good? So not only just the body intelligence, does it bring you joy? Does the number of 500 bring me stress? Like I have to get this? Or is it making me excited and like, "Yeah, let's do this." Which is so much lighter. So really feel in your body, the experience. And let's say, I want to be glorious. Does selling 500, does that feel glorious, or does that feel stressful? Like on this fete I need to accomplish, does making $1 million in a day, does it sound like something I'd love to do? Yes. I was in a swear I didn't. And does that sound exciting? Yes. Does it feel glorious? Yes.
Okay. Now does it feel like something that's going to happen tomorrow? And my body immediately says no. And maybe I should tweak that and work on that so it can be a yes. Yet that's not like really the focus. The focus isn't the money. It's the experience. It's the feeling that's underneath it.
Brigit: Yep. Beautiful. And so what is your vision for 2020? What's coming up in your world over the next 12 months?
Bethany Londyn: Yes. I have not done an online coaching program, so I'm looking to start that. I have this book, which is seven weeks. It's a seven-week process, and it's going to take some handholding. You want to read this with your friends, or your book club, or an accountability group, or an online group, so I am going to start that next year, and I've never done that before, so I'm excited. I love like hearing about you and you're doing that. So yeah, I think that's the movement, and it's a way to serve more people, for of course, like a reasonable cost compared to like one-on-one coaching.
Brigit: Absolutely. Yes. I'm a big advocate for online courses and programs. Beautiful.
Bethany Londyn: Yes.
Brigit: And who do you think you are expressing? Like what part of yourself are you expressing as you are stepping into this coming year?
Bethany Londyn: Joy. So every year I pick a word. I pick a word every single year. And this year it was grace. So next year, joy. Joy, joy, joy. And if it doesn't feel joyous, it's out.
Brigit: I love it. Yes. Choose joy. Beautiful. And then where can people find out more about you and your book, Bethany?
Bethany Londyn: You can find out about me at Bethany Londyn, with a Y, it's a cool factor, L-O-N-D-Y-N.com. And there are links to the book. There are links to the online course there already. And also, Instagram. I do stuff on Instagram and YouTube. So everything is Bethany Londyn. You'll find me.
Brigit: Fantastic. I'm definitely recommend diving into your book for all of this yummy-ness, and what a perfect time of the year to get into that place of alignment.
Bethany Londyn: Just another Kickstarter for sure.
Brigit: Yes. So thank you so much for your time and energy today Bethany. I really appreciate you.
Bethany Londyn: Thank you. Yes, likewise. You're such a joy.
Brigit: Oh, yay. Thank you.
Bethany Londyn: You're welcome. Thank you.
Brigit: Thank you for joining me for today's episode of the Intuitive Entrepreneur podcast. If loved this episode, please leave an honest rating and review on iTunes. It really helps to get the word out, and of course, I read every single comment. Now, if you're an intuitive entrepreneur with desire to build a business fueled by purpose, passion and profit, then you're invited to join me and an intimate group of female business owners in the intuitive entrepreneurs mastermind. All you need to do is add your name to the wait list, and you'll be the first to know when applications are open. So head on over to brigit.me/mastermind. That's B-R-I-G-T.me/mastermind. I'll see you there, and bye for now.
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